Taking off the training wheels

Life is full of seasons.  They often pass so slowly that we don't realize we have shifted from one to another until some momentous occasion when we wonder where all the time has gone.  We often miss the subtle changes, the daily victories, the slow and steady growth or take for granted the normalcy of it all.  I'm realizing I'm not a young mom anymore.  While I still have a couple of young children, I have a teenager and several pre-teens in the house.  Each one of those big kids has had a million moments that transitioned them from newborn to toddler to almost-teen.  Sometimes those moments were celebrated and seen, but many of them have just been part of growing up.  Both are right and good and part of life.  Not everything can be a big deal, or nothing is a big deal.  But slowing down to see that the kiddos God has put in my care are growing, is so important. These days are busy, hard, messy, sweet and passing so quickly.  I'm not good at slowing down.  There is a lot to be done, lots of groceries to buy, laundry to wash, schooling to get in, errands to run, scripture to memorize, meals to prepare, dishes to wash, diapers to change, attitudes to address, hearts to tend.  It's really far more than I can tackle on my own.  People ask how I do it.  My most frequent answers are, "Not very well. One day at a time. With lots of help. By the grace of God."  All of those statements are true, but none really communicates well the reality of the "how" behind our chaos.  There isn't any great secret.  I love my life and want to pull my hair out at the same time.  I adore my kids and want to smack some sense, or respect, or work ethic or kindness into each of them at any given moment.  I treasure the gift of homeschooling and simultaneously fantasize about military boarding school.  So, when God grants moments of quiet or perspective, I am so thankful.  "It is good to give thanks to the LORD!"

 Today I give thanks because little man's training wheels came off and I was the one who got to run beside his bike on this unseasonably warm January day.  It wasn't part of my plan for the day.  I think it was just the goodness of the LORD that caused me to slow down and grant his request to get his bike out the shed, because goodness knows how many requests a day I brush off in the busyness.  What a gift!  He wobbled.  He focused.  He pedaled.  Up and down the street we ran.  Guiding him back to the center of the road before crashing into the bushes as needed, I ate it up.  His confidence grew and he chattered about his growing skill and called his siblings to watch.  They chanted his name and he beamed in bashful delight.  I am not the fun parent in our family, but what fun we had today!  Thank you God!  I wonder  

how many moments like that I miss in my determination to get the house in order, press through another math lesson, or tackle another project.  This is a precious season, and though the days often feel long, I know the years are passing quickly.  Some of the new smart phones have a slow-motion video feature that mine lacks.  I watched some slow-mo clips someone had taken of my kids the other day.  It was fascinating.  The expressions on their faces as they flew through the air, tackled some crazy feat or totally bombed their landing were priceless.  The shots were filmed in such a way that they captured the subtle nuances of emotion that the human eye literally can't take in in real time.  I saw apprehension turn to courage, thrill, and successful joy as well as oblivious ambition turning into calculated concern, a brace for impact and relieved laughter upon lack of injury.  My kids are hilarious and adventurous.  They are soooo predictable and still surprising.  Life will not likely slow down anytime soon, but maybe by God's grace I can spend a little more time in the slow-motion moments giving thanks for the great things the LORD has done.